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How to PACE Yourself In our World of #COVID19

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Jeanette Yoffe M.A. M.F.T.

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Author of Groundbreaking Interventions: Working with Traumatized Children, Teens and Families in Foster Care and Adoption and What s Your Name, Who s Your Daddy? a one woman play about growing up in foster care and adoption available on Amazon and Audible. She has appeared on the OWN and TLC Network, as a Psychotherapist teaching about Adoption in the shows Raising Whitley and Long Lost Family.

In our world today with COVID-19 we ALL need to learn how to pace ourselves, whether we are single, married, or a parent. This acronym will help you self-organize in a world that feels disorganized and unclear. Use this acronym daily, P A C E  to alleviate the uncertainty and confusion, to stay focused on the outcome of certainty and transformation.  

 

BE Playful

Humor is very important to create a quality of lightness and openness.

Laughter builds memories of unconditional acceptance of your/other's experiences.

 

HAVE Acceptance

Understanding your/other's behavior represents your/other's best effort at the

time. “I/they am/are doing the best that I/they could.”

Limits will continue to be set for unsafe situations, and direct behavior by focusing the “teaching on the behavior” and never upon the person.

BE Curios

Have a nonjudgmental, “not knowing” stance to inquire about your/other's

inner life that led to the behaviors so your/other's feel’s safe, that his inner

life will not be criticized. If they sense your judgment, you/they will hide his motives and not be able to modify his behavior.

“What do you think about that?” “ “Tell me about that?”


HAVE Empathy for the uncertainty... using WE and US

Empathy must be conveyed both verbally and non verbally. You/other is not rescued from the event or is the problem solved for either.

“That must be SO hard for you!” “It is really hard for all of US, and we're doing it and

struggling with it.” “I’m so sorry you feel so sorry about _________. We are all in this together.”

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