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Speaking Point: 1. TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR TIME. a. Put things in their places. Organizing your home helps you turn chaos into order.

Speaking Point: b. Cool it, then say it. If you fell stresses because you can’t control your partner or child’s behavior, the first thing to do is to not let yourself get out of control even though the things going on around you are very irritating and bothersome. Then once you have managed to control your own stress in this environment, see if you can communicate in a calm and controlled way.

Speaking Point: c. Make a to-do list of the three most important things you want to accomplish that day, and start with those first.

Speaking Point: 2. ADJUST YOUR ATTITUDE. a. Give yourself mini time-outs. Don’t let yourself become overwhelmed by tasks and obligations, but see them in perspective. b. Set supportive goals. Accept what your can be and don’t waste time worrying about what you can’t be.

Speaking Point: 3. WISHING WON’T MAKE IT HAPPEN. Stop yourself whenever you find yourself thinking, “If only I were rich…if only I had married someone else… if only I hadn’t said what I did...” You may regret your mistake or your life situation, but living in the past or wishing for something you’ll never have only stops you from from reaching new goals.

Speaking Point: 4. TAKE THE WORD “PROBLEM” OUT OF YOUR VOCABULARY. Replace it with the word “challenge.”

Speaking Point: 5. GET THE FACTS. Don’t assume you know what another person is thinking and feeling. (“She’s quiet because she’s unhappy with our marriage…” “He’s unhappy and it’s all my fault.’) Your reactions will likely be off base since they are based on assumptions, not facts.